TheRetroCritic

Confronting the elusive Charlie.

Do you know a guy named Charlie?

Long before Johnny Depp ever entered that chocolate factory with the silliest haircut in town, Gene Wilder had already led a bunch of brats to their untimely, chocolatey demise. And as much as I enjoyed Tim Burton's modern take on Roald Dahl's timeless story, this original version is simply unbeatable. While not completely faithful to the book, Willy Wonka And The Chocolate Factory still ticks all the right boxes and captures the spirit of the story perfectly whereas the later re-imagining lacked genuine charm, which this one has tons of. Charlie is played by a geeky but convincing Peter Ostrum who manages to break your heart more than once over the course of the film. Gene Wilder, of course, is Willy Wonka and steals the show effortlessly right from under everyone's noses. From the get-go he is the character and you can't wait to go on this surreal adventure with him. He even gets a song which, his singing voice being... what it is, isn't too vocally impress

There were some great spoofs back in the day: Airplane! , Top Secret! , The Naked Gun . Hot Shots: Part Deux , I recall being pretty good also. But as for the original Hot Shots! nothing rang a bell expect that it was a Top Gun piss-take and that Charlie Sheen was once again the lead. One re-watch later and, although Hot Shots! does have its amusing moments, I wouldn't list it on the same level as the aforementioned bunch. Maybe I've just grown-up or maybe a lot of the humour hasn't dated terribly well, I don't know. Watching it now, it was more miss than hit I felt. One of the jokes sees an old Native American dude listening to a walkman and asking Sheen to bring back some AA batteries. I guess back then that was like the equivalent of an iPod reference or something (for the kids?). Thing is: random "modern" technology references in spoofs are rarely funny, they're just... there. Remember those ads the Scary Movie gang parodied in their franchise?

Talk about a 90's cast... Yes Kiefer Sutherland, Charlie Sheen, Chris O'Donnell and Oliver Platt face-off against Tim Curry's villainous Cardinal Richelieu in this Disney-produced Hollywood adaptation of the classic Alexandre Dumas tale. No, I never pictured Jack Bauer as a musketeer either but hey, he makes a good Athos. Actually, the three musketeers work pretty well despite not matching the characters from the book to the letter. Charlie Sheen's Aramis is far too 'winningly' jokey and Oliver Platt's Porthos has one one-liner too many I think but on the whole you buy that these guys could be a team, and that's the main thing. The plot takes key elements from Dumas' novel but reduces the plot to a more simplistic good people vs bad people kind of thing which is a bit of a shame but considering they're telling this whole story in under 2 hours, that's fair enough. The film starts off surprisingly well actually. Chris O'Donnell, o

Blaming  Twilight  entirely for the recent burst of corny teen nonsense (shriek! abs!) is easy but one mustn't forget all the Hannah Montanas and High School Musicals which helped kick start the new trend of (shriek! abs!) pseudo-romantic teen movies. Yes  Dear John , I'm pointing at you too. You wartime-set, letter sending...bastard. Anyway, so one could say Twilight is partly to blame for the spread of (shriek! abs!) naivety throughout modern cinema but the real culprit really is Disney. And with the company now proud owner of the rights to Marvel films, god help us all... And so we get to Zac Efron (shirek! abs!). I managed to avoid  17 Again  but I have to say the trailer for Charlie St Cloud was unintentionally funny enough to spark my interest. The  High School Musical  alumni's puppet-like stare and Mentos-selling grin might just provide some welcome comedy! Charlie St Cloud, indeed, was pretty funny. But also pretty harmless. As a film I was expecting somethi

Just when you thought Charlie Kaufman couldn't possibly have anymore mind-melting tricks up his sleeve, out comes Synecdoche, New York to blow everything out of the water. Like David Lynch's epic  Inland Empire , Charlie Kaufman goes all out to create an incredibly dense, complex and unique work of art like there's never been before.  His decision to direct turns out to be not only daring but a blessing as it makes Synecdoche as bleak and real visually as it is in its philosophy and tone. Philip Seymour Hoffman proves once again why he's one of the best actors around with a subtle, touching and heartbreaking performance which should receive an Oscar gong come next year, if there's any justice. The rest of the cast is unexpected but absolutely spot on with everyone giving it their best shot.  Charlie Kaufman's fascination with the human mind reaches its peak here and this is by far his deepest and most fascinating work to date. Synecdoche New York is by no m

Blaming Twilight entirely for the recent burst of corny teen nonsense (shriek! abs!) is easy but one mustn't forget all the Hannah Montanas and High School Musicals which helped kick start the new trend of (shriek! abs!) pseudo-romantic teen movies. Yes Dear John , I'm pointing at you too. You wartime-set, letter sending...bastard. Anyway, so one could say Twilight is partly to blame for the spread of (shriek! abs!) naivety throughout modern cinema but the real culprit really is Disney. And with the company now proud owner of the rights to Marvel films, god help us all... And so we get to Zac Efron (shirek! abs!). I managed to avoid 17 Again but I have to say the trailer for Charlie St Cloud was unintentionally funny enough to spark my interest. The High School Musical alumni's puppet-like stare and Mentos-selling grin might just provide some welcome comedy! Charlie St Cloud, indeed, was pretty funny. But also pretty harmless. As a film I was expecting something n