3/6/13

SHARKTOPUS - REVIEW


The great Roger Corman returns with yet another B movie creature feature. Forget Piranhacondas, for now is the time of Sharktopi.

Yes, apparently the US Navy, under Eric Roberts' supervision, one day decided to merge a shark with an octopus to create the ultimate killing machine. All was well while the beast was under control but our luck has finally run out and the Sharktopus is loose and out for blood.

Why a shark and an octopus, you ask?

Because Eric Roberts was drunk, that's why.

Sharktopus is every bit as trashy as the title suggests and it couldn't be any prouder of that. You've got a cheap-looking CGI monster, a poorly shot, shockingly acted, mostly overcast Summer horror flick which takes Jaws and Piranhas the hell out of it once more. We've had mega sharks, giant octopi, sharks with two heads, it was only a matter of time before the B movie world would give Sharktopus a shot, really. The film is completely self-aware and doesn't waste any time, or MUCH time I should say. Characters are briefly introduced, they get involved in some kind of water sport and get chewed up by Sharktopus. Simple. Meanwhile, Eric Roberts gets wasted and his personality-free daughter along with her personality-free jock pal try and find a way to stop Sharktopus. There's a recurring joke involving the word "pumpkin", one of the worst movie scores around and a fun cameo appearance from Mr Corman himself!

What's not to like?

Oh, also Hollywood Babble-On co-host Ralph Garman rocks a cameo as radio DJ Captain Jack who gets the best lines in the whole thing and one of the very best deaths so keep your eyes peeled for that. As you can imagine, the entire flick is peppered with ladies not wearing that very much at all but the quality of the film itself, visually, is so poor that it completely negates the Summer movie "effect" it's going for, something which Piranha 3D got right.

With a touch more style (Grindhouse or Spielbergian) and... better equipment, frankly, Sharktopus could have really stood out. As it stands, it's one of the better, if not slicker, creature features around and is well worth a watch.

Damn you Sharktopus!

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